The Mum Caked In Crap

Tucking my first born in, it was apparent. I was struggling. The sleepless nights, the sore breasts, the sheer exhaustion of being a new Mum, it had taken its toll, and it was real - very very real. The baby blues had hit. Rocking a baby to sleep that didn't want to sleep, was the ticking point. It made an emotion arouse that I never imagined in my life that I would ever feel, especially towards my own flesh and blood, my own child that I had birthed. With tears rolling down my cheeks and my two week old daughter hanging from my arm, I tapped into my phone "Symptoms of baby blues and depression two weeks after birth". I was shocked to see soooo many Mums that had typed the same as me into Mumsnet. The pit of my stomach was filled with a sick feeling as the first symptom said 'feelings of not being good enough for newborn baby'.. Oh my god its me, what a hideous person I am. I was meant to be a Mum, I was meant to feel maternal and amazing 24/7. After a wee...

Wow. What a week. This week has consisted of me holding back so many tears, 400 times a day I could've opened up the flood gates. However, I need to remind myself that it's normal. I'm still adjusting, as is my 3 year old to our new life as a 4 piece. This week I've been so stressed, it's been jam packed with tears, tantrums, and vaccinations. It has been far from easy. I've tried more than twice to put on a brave face, but I'll admit. I'm pooped. I've been finding my 3 year old extremely demanding and wanting all of my attention, which I think is because her brother is becoming more sociable. He's wanting to interact more now , and constantly wants me sitting him up and being his support. Which also means that there are 3 wicker baskets full to the brim of washing to be packed away, crumbs to be hoovered and sides to be polished. Which I should be doing tonight whilst my Mum has my daughter. However, I've just demolished an Indian an...

Forget listening to Mum about fashion, and life, I knew it all did you?  1. Belts - The bigger the better, looked especially good around the waist or riding right onto the hips. Looked even better around a cardigan. 2. Covering the face in Maybelline Dream Matte Mousse. Always go for at least two shades darker, or two shades lighter. Never rub it into the neck. 3. No Mum, its a dress, not a top. Rock on up to the teen disco in what can only be described as a throwback from 2007, looking like Cascada.  4. Black hair dye underneath the blonde - Super super dark next to bleach blonde, really fashionable, so fashionable that the whole friendship group did the same. Walking about like a Pussy Cat Dolls tribute band.  5. Borrowing friends clothes, whether they would fit or not. If your mate was an 8 and you were a 12, you could squeeze into it no probs.  6. Curl, straight, curl, straight. Take it in turns to take a section of each from you...

I'm back.  Now, you know those adverts on television, where the little family of 4 is running off to the sea, splashing each other, smiling, and the Mum is sat there with a pina colada? Yep, forget it.  That was not the image of our first family holiday let me tell you, it was the total opposite.   We were blessed with the weather, and there was not a cloud in the sky for the 6 days we were there. We were also blessed when both children were angels in the car too and from the holiday. The last thing we needed was two screaming kids in a 45 minute motorway traffic jam. Although (clever Mum alert) I was stacked with sweets (bad Mum alert) in case of this, not for the newborn obviously.  So with Mr Sunshine beaming down on our caravan, our smiles were on and we were geared up to have a stress free, our daughter will try new foods holiday. The 'daughter will eat new foods' went out of the window approximately 1 hour after arriving at the complex. On t...